I'm still desperate to find you. You're in the same room, you're right in front of me. But we both know you're mind is wandering somewhere else.
Scan the room and sets of eyes, hoping to find some familiar ones that might still have a hint of love in them.
Jealously gets the best of all of us. Scan sets of eyes, only to find yours on someone elses.
And I could write (type) out the most beautiful, poetic set of words to tell you how much you mean to me, even though you don't know it. And you wouldn't know it. I don't know how i feel about this anymore. We're both changing. But I still feel exactly the same.
Maybe I could tell you how I find hope in your smile. Maybe I could go on about how it's our little conversations that keep me going some days. Or the memory of them. because in those conversations, we found something. a connection. I could probably babble on more about how your presence alone gives me chills, but I do not feel cold. This is all souding cliche. But it's ok, because you're going to be reading this, and everything I'm saying is going to slip through you like the sand in a broken hourglass. You won't comprehend. You won't understand. Then again, does anyone understand any of this? It's like the sand in the broken hourglass. Why worry about the time because for us, it was never there to begin with.
Why am I still here dropping hints like so? Why do I bother? I have so many questions for both you and myself. When I'm with you I never bother asking those questions. In that moment being there is enough. More cliche words: As soon as I'm with you it just all makes sense. Are you aware? Of course not. Why?
I saw the way your eyes scanned the room as mine did. But we were not looking for each other. Your mind was wandering. Places you'd rather be, people you'd rather see. My apologies for not being everything you wanted.
I just hope your happy.
