But another part thinks that's your job.
I hate seeing you so alone.
I think this last week in a half was the hardest I've had in a long time. Not the hardest ever, oh no. But I was doing so good, and felt so happy and alive. And what made it seem worse, was no one would come over, or even call to console me. Not that I needed a bunch of consoling, or expected people to do it. I mean it's always just nice to have a friend there.
But the point is, today wasn't all bad. Little things scattered throughout the day seemed to give me hope. Real hope too, if you can competely etablish the difference between false hope and real hope.
The bags under my eyes mark how long it's been
kind of like how you can tell a trees age by it's rings.
When i do close my eyes
all I see is summer
and I can almost smell your scent.
And I thought about all those moments when a "wish you were here" didn't even seem to cut it.
Gloomy days and gloomy smiles, that somehow get us by. Finding hope in each other, in the fact that the other one is as miserable as the other, and we're not completely alone.
A part of me misses the way your words always had such meaning, every time they'd slowly trail off your lips, and all the passion in your eyes. But there's that other part of me that knows it was never really gone. There's the days when I think it's all hopeless, but I know you're always there for me, even when I didn't believe it. One thing I learned these past few months, I'm always loved even though it rarely feels like it.
I want to live again. Let's re-ignite the passion in our eyes. Fall back in touch. Two teenagers who don't give a damn about the world around them. Carefree. Rememeber how we used to be?
I was thinking the other day that everything happens for a reason. Like I was meant to know every person I do. And if somehow the relationship failed, the reason was that I learned from it and grew. I really think there's a reason for all of this....
ox
